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This is a very personal topic and like many topics (but not others) becomes interesting once you delve into the particulars and specifics. I will begin with some general thoughts and might comment more later.

"Finally, but related to the above, do you want to be around after death?"

In many ways, I will be, whether I like it or not. It's the big "I guess we'll find out" how, when we do. I find the idea of "eternal rest" comforting and appealing. But what if that's just another misconception? Then all that "I'll sleep when I'm dead" gets turned on its head and it would then be "I have to sleep while I can, because I'll get no rest once I'm dead!"

"Do you want people to hold seances and call on you?"

I personally would not dare to call on anyone after they've departed. If there is such a thing as a rest, I'd not like to disturb them. But if seances were truly a real possibility and not just a fiction we delude ourselves with, I could not honestly close myself off to the possibility. I would not have a choice either way, or would I? Life finds a way, I'd be alive in another form, if other forms of life reach out to me, I will respond accordingly to my mood, level of affinity.

"Do you want to chat with your people after they've shuffled off, walked on?"

Like I said, not by way of a seance, but nowadays with books, audio, video, one could simulate or continue a sort of conversation after they're gone. They can only respond with things they've already said before, dug out by other people potentially, twisted in this or that way to support their own angle. It also gives those living to "have the last word" at least for a short while while they're alive or while events still hold out on proving the dead person right or wrong. Some writer once described writing as a cruel form of revenge after you're dead, your words haunting others or something. Was it Zerzan? It must have been said by millions others at least.

"What is important about death, in your relationships with specific people?"

This is a hard question. In all honesty, I take people for granted until they're gone, and then there's just sadness ameliorated by fading pleasant memories and lingering regrets.

"How do people become *more* present once they can never be around again?"

This is not always the case, but it sometimes is. Some people are turned into icons and mere image and are mass reproduced endlessly, you will find them in statues, movies, tshirts, books, and even your soup. Then there is the case of hauntings and poltergeists.

"What is an appropriate (to you) relationship to the dead?"

Each person is unique, no standard relationship to all dead across the board. I can envision still taking to some, some I just forget and never think of again. They can still be looked up to, looked down on, or learned from the stories of their lives.