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a thought experiment: OP infers that they've had a bad time with "ethical anarchists" trying to push them around or whatever. no doubt that's true, we've probably all had some version of this experience. but how many other times have we failed to meet somebody's expectations according to their values but they were chill about it and didn't bother making it an issue?

literally countless times, for everyone.

so it's a confirmation bias to say something like "ethical anarchists always give me shit for [blank]" because you hardly ever notice when somebody doesn't give you shit for [blank]. how could you?